Ladies and gentlemen, we gather here today to mourn the passing of Elmer’s Art Paste. It is with a heavy heart that we bid farewell to this beloved product that has helped us create so many fond memories in our classrooms over the years.
Elmer’s Art Paste was a true art teacher’s companion, always there to help our students create masterpieces that we could proudly display. Whether it was making papier-mâché animals, bowls, or giant Claes Oldenburg inspired everyday objects, Elmer’s Art Paste was always up to the task.
We’ll never forget the countless hours we spent with Elmer’s Art Paste, covered in glue from fingertips to elbows, creating beautiful works of art that our students’ parents pretended to love.
It was always there for us, even when we didn’t appreciate it. It was so easy to just open the little bag, add some water and it just magically thickened before our eyes. It could just kept for days, weeks, nay MONTHS without growing mold.
But let’s be honest, Elmer’s Art Paste was more than just a glue. It was a trusted friend, a confidante, a shoulder to cry on when our art projects didn’t turn out quite as planned. It was always there for us whenever we needed it.
So let us raise a glass to Elmer’s Art Paste, a glue that will never be forgotten. May it rest in peace, knowing that it brought joy and creativity to the lives of so many. And let us all vow to honor its memory by continuing to create and innovate, always with a little bit of Elmer’s Art Paste in our hearts.